I’ve been asked this question so many times by close friends and practical strangers: “How did you know your husband was the one you were supposed to marry?” A common answer–and I agree with this–is “When you know, you know.” There is a definite moment where it just clicks and you both realize “This is for forever.” It’s a concept that’s hard to grasp, and although I felt Jerrell was my future husband the first time we sat down alone and talked for hours, even I needed some reassurance.
It wasn’t until I took my romance to God that I really felt beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was time to prepare for marriage. As much as one could. Just like having kids, you never ever feel ready to be a husband or wife. You couldn’t possibly because there’s no way to rehearse it. I’ve even talked to couples who had lived together for years and felt like marriage was just a piece of paper, but once they tied the knot the experience and the security was noticeably different.
I’m not saying divorce isn’t real or can’t happen just because you pray, but the institute of marriage that God designed is meant to be until death. This doesn’t make it easy, this doesn’t make it cute, it just means you should understand that you’re making a binding contract with someone and it’s something to take very seriously.
We’re coming upon seven years of marriage, and fortunately I am married to a person who is as committed to God and our little family as I am. Without that dedication, the rough patches we’ve been through could have broken us. Only by God’s grace are we happily married and stronger every year. Holding onto God’s promises and thinking back on the days He confirmed that Jerrell was the one I would journey through life with reminds me that our meeting wasn’t up to chance. It was a divine encounter.
I hope my story encourages you. I’d love to hear your feedback and learn more about your journey as well.
Kytia L’amour is a writer, performer, and photographer spreading God’s love in all art forms. Reaching out to young women and sharing her story is what keeps her heart beating for Christ.
Kytia lives in sunny Los Angeles with her husband and daughter.